Question:
Hi,
I have recently joined in AUST, (A renowned private university of Bangladesh), as a lecturer in the School of Business. This is my first job. Yesterday was a great day for me as it was the 1st day in my office. Also, it was a horrible day, too.
Our staffs (men and women)share same wash room at the offices. After lunch we had an orientation ceremony for freshmen students of the Fall semester. When I went to get freshened before going to the orientation ceremony, I faced an odd moment. I locked the door to my stall, but, at the time of urination, suddenly, one of my male colleagues opened the door by twisting the nob, and found me on the commode.
After that I have been feeling so shy that I wonder how can face him the next time I see him.
Why am I having to face this? Should I leave the job? How will I be treated in next time I see him. I m so nervous.
Please help me. Should I talk to him or what should I do? Please, please suggest something.
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Answer:
First, I want to strongly tell you that, you should not and must not, leave this job. There is no reason to do so. Let me explain why:
This is one of those embarrassing situations that happen to everyone from time to time. It is one of those awkward situations that makes all us want to run and hide. When we get over the embarrassment, most of us are able to laugh about it because, in reality, it is very humorous. It doesn’t feel that way at the time but, the hope is that most of us come to see the humor in it. My guess is that he feels equally embarrassed for having opened the door.
Of course, the fact that you are a new faculty member just starting this job, causes you to feel more anxious and nervous than you otherwise feel in your daily life. That anxiety causes everything to feel exaggerated and serious than it actually is.
As to how to handle it the next time you see him, I would suggest that you ignore it. If he mentions it, perhaps by apologizing for opening the door, you can laugh about it with him and dismiss it as umimportant.
Forgive yourself for this having happened and forgive him. Remember, all of us, men and women, do the same things in the wash rooms. It’s just being human.
Most of all, breath deeply and relax.
I want to wish you the very best of luck in your new career.
